Thursday, May 27, 2010
Wednesday, May 26, 2010
Bummery
Today i got news that my uncle that was going to be going away with us (keyword: was) has lost his job up north, due to the mining companies changing who they use to tow their ships around (Western Maritime, have lost the contract with Rio). This means that Nicole and I won't be going on our mid-year holiday. Which sucks arse, but is not the most pressing thing right now. The loss of his job also means my aunty and her family can no longer live in Dampier, as they were living in a home owned by the employed company, and it has a cost of $1500 per week for them to rent. Basically they have until the eviction date to vacate their house. They potentially will live with us for quite awhile. Its always nice to have them around, they are very close family, my cousin is like a little brother, and my aunty is well probably closer to a second sister in terms of the structure of our relationship.
Today i went into Freo with jess after getting forms from the post office, and before going to uni for a help class. all i have to say is.... "HEY JESS!" ... *whispers* "trench coat!"
Now for some trench coats:
Now for some trench coats:
Link of the post is a vintage gay porn blog thingy that Jess gave me the link too.
http://that-suicide-is-painless.tumblr.com/
The first post at the moment i don't like so much, but there is some pretty good stuff on there.
The first post at the moment i don't like so much, but there is some pretty good stuff on there.
Monday, May 24, 2010
Rantings
Party on Sunday was an absolute flop. All the hot gay guys that were meant to be going didn't show up, and the rest of the people there (except for a few like Francoise, Christine and Nicole) had no charisma, or even a mildly crazy streak.
We stayed for a few hours out of obligation in which, N, F and I proceeded to do our usual random noises and actions elaborately, then went back to Fran's.
We watched the local Perth TV for a bit, laughing at the show that was basically cooking for bogans, with a cute guy who looked strangely familiar. After that, 'Shaun of the Dead' was put on. Love that movie :D
The costume was a flop, i so cbfd that night that i didn't go through with it. Just went in normal clothes. And apparently, i was popular amongst the straight girls..... again >.> dammit, why can't they have penises..... and be guys........ preferably at the same time.....
In other news:
I finally got to see dad again for the first time in ages. It was good, but i still feel like i haven't caught up with him, as that night i had more conversation with my step-mum then i did with him. There is something either there, or decidedly not there going on in his mind, and i can never find the one on one time to talk to him properly. I just want him to stop ignoring whatever it is that he is, that he always has and come to terms with it. He's been through a lot in his time, but still, he frustrates me. This is where communication comes in again. Any subtlety and hints are wasted on him, its like hinting to a wall, but finding the time to be blunt with him in a place where no one else will be offended is damn difficult. The upside of the visit was to actually see him, and my new laptop that i was meant to have for the start of uni, the one i was using before, now that my porn is removed, is going back to Darren's work or some shit like that.
I visited Nanna with my sister today, she and her partner (Ron) seemed to be really excited to see us, and fussed over us greatly. Nanna especially made us a really nice soup for lunch, and Ron showed us all the camping gear he's willing to lend us for our camping holiday, and how to use it. So now, we don't need to buy too much more camping stuff for when we go away. Nanna also greatly surprised us, as for the last few months (since she found out we were going up north for a month) has been saving money for our trip. Every time she surprises us like this, we try to give it back to her, but she is so stubborn with how much she insists we take it, that if we don't accept it, she'll sneak it into our bags or something. This behaviour of hers, although it makes me guilty, has saved me a lot, many times. This time however it has taken the... cake? she showed me the money, she has saved $500 for us, and she said there will be more by the time she goes away. I tried really hard to turn down her offer, but in the end, Nicole and I just decided we'd pay her back once we return and have the money to spare.
Eddy has finally reciprocated interest after months of it being a one sided friendship. Although i think its a little suss for it to be straight out of the blue like this, i'm thinking he's using it as a means to escape his 'other life' at the moment. He has many troubles currently, and throughout all the ones he's encountered since i met him, i've been the only definite constant. He has also expressed guilt about not showing enough gratitude/care towards me. On Friday night he is staying over, and i should get a chance to finally communicate properly with him. Typing all this makes me feel like crap because i'm being judgemental of myself for typing it, even knowing the situation, and having confirmation from multiple view points without me asking. I dwell on shit, that's my problem, and i can recall shit that i have said and done, and that other people have said and done from years ago. Like silly stuff from year 1, and some of the mistakes i made when my hearing started to go bad in year 9 (probably due to the drum kit being played hell loudly only a few meters away from me for at least an hour a day for 3 or 4 years, and the headphones i used to drown everything out with instead of dealing with it... but that's a tale for a different time when it is more relevant.)
Bloody hell, two picture fors today, as i don't have my porn collection organised on this computer, they will have to be non-pornographic...
We stayed for a few hours out of obligation in which, N, F and I proceeded to do our usual random noises and actions elaborately, then went back to Fran's.
We watched the local Perth TV for a bit, laughing at the show that was basically cooking for bogans, with a cute guy who looked strangely familiar. After that, 'Shaun of the Dead' was put on. Love that movie :D
The costume was a flop, i so cbfd that night that i didn't go through with it. Just went in normal clothes. And apparently, i was popular amongst the straight girls..... again >.> dammit, why can't they have penises..... and be guys........ preferably at the same time.....
In other news:
I finally got to see dad again for the first time in ages. It was good, but i still feel like i haven't caught up with him, as that night i had more conversation with my step-mum then i did with him. There is something either there, or decidedly not there going on in his mind, and i can never find the one on one time to talk to him properly. I just want him to stop ignoring whatever it is that he is, that he always has and come to terms with it. He's been through a lot in his time, but still, he frustrates me. This is where communication comes in again. Any subtlety and hints are wasted on him, its like hinting to a wall, but finding the time to be blunt with him in a place where no one else will be offended is damn difficult. The upside of the visit was to actually see him, and my new laptop that i was meant to have for the start of uni, the one i was using before, now that my porn is removed, is going back to Darren's work or some shit like that.
I visited Nanna with my sister today, she and her partner (Ron) seemed to be really excited to see us, and fussed over us greatly. Nanna especially made us a really nice soup for lunch, and Ron showed us all the camping gear he's willing to lend us for our camping holiday, and how to use it. So now, we don't need to buy too much more camping stuff for when we go away. Nanna also greatly surprised us, as for the last few months (since she found out we were going up north for a month) has been saving money for our trip. Every time she surprises us like this, we try to give it back to her, but she is so stubborn with how much she insists we take it, that if we don't accept it, she'll sneak it into our bags or something. This behaviour of hers, although it makes me guilty, has saved me a lot, many times. This time however it has taken the... cake? she showed me the money, she has saved $500 for us, and she said there will be more by the time she goes away. I tried really hard to turn down her offer, but in the end, Nicole and I just decided we'd pay her back once we return and have the money to spare.
Eddy has finally reciprocated interest after months of it being a one sided friendship. Although i think its a little suss for it to be straight out of the blue like this, i'm thinking he's using it as a means to escape his 'other life' at the moment. He has many troubles currently, and throughout all the ones he's encountered since i met him, i've been the only definite constant. He has also expressed guilt about not showing enough gratitude/care towards me. On Friday night he is staying over, and i should get a chance to finally communicate properly with him. Typing all this makes me feel like crap because i'm being judgemental of myself for typing it, even knowing the situation, and having confirmation from multiple view points without me asking. I dwell on shit, that's my problem, and i can recall shit that i have said and done, and that other people have said and done from years ago. Like silly stuff from year 1, and some of the mistakes i made when my hearing started to go bad in year 9 (probably due to the drum kit being played hell loudly only a few meters away from me for at least an hour a day for 3 or 4 years, and the headphones i used to drown everything out with instead of dealing with it... but that's a tale for a different time when it is more relevant.)
Bloody hell, two picture fors today, as i don't have my porn collection organised on this computer, they will have to be non-pornographic...
The first is nice, the second is irrelevant.
It's a moose.
It's 1am, i plan on going to uni tomorrow so its my sleepy time now.
(if i have swapped words around or put them in the wrong spot, it is because i cannot concentrate right now).
Goodnight! :)
(if i have swapped words around or put them in the wrong spot, it is because i cannot concentrate right now).
Goodnight! :)
Wednesday, May 19, 2010
A Cleaning Mastie
I find it strange, when i know i need to clean shit up, i just really can't be bothered.... so it turns into a mastie.
Dishes? ... screw that *walks to room*
Vacuuming? ... It can wait for awhile
I find when i eventually do get around to the cleaning, i hate it even more.
I think that counts as procrastibation, awesome.
Costume has changed, and been constructed. Instead of what i said earlier, i am now going in a towel transformed into a shirt, and a curtain, changed into a long skirt.
I had to do this because my upper legs are more...... developed? then they were the last time i wore a Coles, calico bag as a skirt (when i was 14/15 i dressed up as sailor moon and wore a blue one). It looked hilarious on, but it ripped right up to where my underwear will be.
Dishes? ... screw that *walks to room*
Vacuuming? ... It can wait for awhile
I find when i eventually do get around to the cleaning, i hate it even more.
I think that counts as procrastibation, awesome.
Costume has changed, and been constructed. Instead of what i said earlier, i am now going in a towel transformed into a shirt, and a curtain, changed into a long skirt.
I had to do this because my upper legs are more...... developed? then they were the last time i wore a Coles, calico bag as a skirt (when i was 14/15 i dressed up as sailor moon and wore a blue one). It looked hilarious on, but it ripped right up to where my underwear will be.
On a different note, the other day i was in a computer lab with a friend, and i was bored. So while she was away i started to type the discussion of her experiment/transect.
I won't include it in here as it has potential to offend, but the basis of it is, Dylana (my friend who's report it was) caused the bombing of Hiroshima during WWII.
I won't include it in here as it has potential to offend, but the basis of it is, Dylana (my friend who's report it was) caused the bombing of Hiroshima during WWII.
And is it me, or is David Williams not wearing any pants:
Regardless, i know he certainly isn't here (if you click on it the photo becomes quite large.... and you can see quite a lot of his, -assets) :
Monday, May 17, 2010
Cream Cheese On My Shoe.
Things have been going alright recently, I'm in a very celebratory mood about finishing semester 1, and my family and social lives seem intact and functioning.
I've been working towards getting fitter too, however it is obvious i have a long way to go to get as fit as i used to be. I went for a run a night or two ago, and although i did it at a different pace to what i used to, i only went a third of the distance. Which is still 3km but its not a distance I'm satisfied with by any means. I've also been doing a small workout routine in the mornings before riding to uni. So far, its too soon to see any results, but i hope it works.
This week/weekend should be a big one too.
This Thursday there is "Drunk At Uni Day" which, although i'm not going to be drinking at (as i can't afford the alcohol), i will be coming in anyway.
On Saturday, I've finally organised a time to catch up with dad for the first time since uni started, it should be good to see him again and celebrate the sale of his business, which probably entails going to the pub for a few drinks (i doubt i'll be having alcohol though) then going to a restaurant, having a decent meal, before going back to his house for some beers.
I'll also be able to organise some time to work so that i can actually pay for things, although i hate working with my step-mum, its worth the ~12 dollars an hour, with extremely flexible and understanding hours. (Although if you say you can work on a day, you're expected to work 9 till 5.)
And on Sunday, i will be going to a "Anything But Clothes" party....
I have my costume planned, i just need to buy some (preferably) black bin bags, a Coles green bag and a bucket......
It should be fun, and there should be some fairly hot guys there, the girl who's room warming party it is, is a personal trainer and all her gym mates should be going. Although i don't think I'll be good enough to be able to pick up at all. I can still try though. I won't be drinking here either for the same reason though, no money to afford it.
Right now, in my sleep deprived state, i must clean the room a little before napping until almost 1:30.... But i forgot my lunch so i'll probably need to make a journey to a food place and buy something really cheap.
The drama is also filtering out of my life, which i am appreciating. The recent escapade with my, well he was my best friend is fizzling out, I've decided if I'm not worth his time at the moment, he's not worth mine. All i can really do is carry on with my life and see when/if he comes around. For his sake, i just hope he doesn't get into the shit some of his friends are.
And as i am on the Queer Room's computer, i won't be putting porn pics or links in this post.
I've been working towards getting fitter too, however it is obvious i have a long way to go to get as fit as i used to be. I went for a run a night or two ago, and although i did it at a different pace to what i used to, i only went a third of the distance. Which is still 3km but its not a distance I'm satisfied with by any means. I've also been doing a small workout routine in the mornings before riding to uni. So far, its too soon to see any results, but i hope it works.
This week/weekend should be a big one too.
This Thursday there is "Drunk At Uni Day" which, although i'm not going to be drinking at (as i can't afford the alcohol), i will be coming in anyway.
On Saturday, I've finally organised a time to catch up with dad for the first time since uni started, it should be good to see him again and celebrate the sale of his business, which probably entails going to the pub for a few drinks (i doubt i'll be having alcohol though) then going to a restaurant, having a decent meal, before going back to his house for some beers.
I'll also be able to organise some time to work so that i can actually pay for things, although i hate working with my step-mum, its worth the ~12 dollars an hour, with extremely flexible and understanding hours. (Although if you say you can work on a day, you're expected to work 9 till 5.)
And on Sunday, i will be going to a "Anything But Clothes" party....
I have my costume planned, i just need to buy some (preferably) black bin bags, a Coles green bag and a bucket......
It should be fun, and there should be some fairly hot guys there, the girl who's room warming party it is, is a personal trainer and all her gym mates should be going. Although i don't think I'll be good enough to be able to pick up at all. I can still try though. I won't be drinking here either for the same reason though, no money to afford it.
Right now, in my sleep deprived state, i must clean the room a little before napping until almost 1:30.... But i forgot my lunch so i'll probably need to make a journey to a food place and buy something really cheap.
The drama is also filtering out of my life, which i am appreciating. The recent escapade with my, well he was my best friend is fizzling out, I've decided if I'm not worth his time at the moment, he's not worth mine. All i can really do is carry on with my life and see when/if he comes around. For his sake, i just hope he doesn't get into the shit some of his friends are.
And as i am on the Queer Room's computer, i won't be putting porn pics or links in this post.
Thursday, May 13, 2010
Monday, May 10, 2010
Fapping Fury!
Well maybe not exactly as the title implies, but this does involve fapping, and frustration.
Today i just haven't been able to ignore the fact i really need to fap, like right this minute kinda thing. Except, as circumstance, and situation turns out, this would be widely unacceptable. Its not the sorta thing you do in public. Or when everyone is home and wanting you to talk to them. Or when there is a short amount of time left before dinner, too short to get one out.
Putting it simply, there is all this urge to fap, and not much else to do, yet its frustrating that i can't find time to do it today >.> will have to wait till later on tonight. My porn situation is annoying me too, the sites are taking way too long to load :\
Miscellaneous porn + soft stuff, and because of how i feel right now, I'll put up more then usual:
Today i just haven't been able to ignore the fact i really need to fap, like right this minute kinda thing. Except, as circumstance, and situation turns out, this would be widely unacceptable. Its not the sorta thing you do in public. Or when everyone is home and wanting you to talk to them. Or when there is a short amount of time left before dinner, too short to get one out.
Putting it simply, there is all this urge to fap, and not much else to do, yet its frustrating that i can't find time to do it today >.> will have to wait till later on tonight. My porn situation is annoying me too, the sites are taking way too long to load :\
CBF with link. XD
Sunday, May 9, 2010
Zombie + etc
Saturday night, Francoises zombie 20th, was awesome well at least to the part where i started throwing up the cheap alcohol like i've never vommed before....
From this day forward, that rather embarrassing combination won't be combination of reducing standards won't be repeated....
beer + goon + cheap champagne (CHAM-PAG-NAY!!!!) = a toxic combination of alcohol, of which so much should not be consumed. I woke up this morning in my bed still kinda feeling like i needed to vom, but i didn't. I also found claw marks going down the wall of the toilet....... that was interesting, gave a real zombie touch to a house which missed out on the party. I won't go into too much of the nitty gritty, the sooner i leave this out of my head the better.
Shit i drink like my father >.> at least i don't drink at the same frequency.
In other news, i'm fairly sure one of my closest friends who has been seemingly avoiding me finally realized through something that happened recently and is now feeling guilty. Yet as he has the intuition and perception of a rock, he hasn't caught onto the fact he's doing, just the fact he's caught onto something to do with me. Shit this gets annoying. I need to talk to him in person to make sure he gets it though. As a friend i love him, but if it comes down to it, if he needs to break away, he can. Although i'd be upset, I'd let him do it as long as he knew he could always come to me if he needed to. This is where i feel slightly used though, i feel extremely betrayed whenever he comes to me for help (although i still give it) because if he doesn't need to discuss something i can get practically ignored.
Right now, a mastie followed by sleep is in order i believe.
Right now, a mastie followed by sleep is in order i believe.
Sunday, May 2, 2010
Penis
I'm currently watching a docco about penis size.
Its a funny topic, with so much insecurity about it. I personally don't see how any size really should have any bearing on who the person is. Personally i'm completely fine with my size, i just have a curiosity about the sizes of others when i'm in certain moods (its like a weird mood between being completely contented and wanting to fap). The docco i'm watching is called "My Penis And Everyone Else's" and i found it on "The Ministry Of Pleasure" which is a blog i follow quite regularly.
Its a funny topic, with so much insecurity about it. I personally don't see how any size really should have any bearing on who the person is. Personally i'm completely fine with my size, i just have a curiosity about the sizes of others when i'm in certain moods (its like a weird mood between being completely contented and wanting to fap). The docco i'm watching is called "My Penis And Everyone Else's" and i found it on "The Ministry Of Pleasure" which is a blog i follow quite regularly.
I can imagine it is a very close issue to the journalist, you can tell just by the opening few minutes. I also imagine its a very difficult thing for him to talk about with his parents, especially as bluntly as he does. It is interesting, but i can't say i agree or am partial to the psychologies mentioned so far.
I've seen the documentary he refers to in saying "two years ago" it was also interesting. He delves into psychology quite well in that one.
I've seen the documentary he refers to in saying "two years ago" it was also interesting. He delves into psychology quite well in that one.
I'll probably put more up about this later
Saturday, May 1, 2010
controversial issues
>.>
Yet again i have said things i probably shouldn't have. What was i saying earlier about my mouth getting into trouble? (Although i'm not in trouble)
Yet again i have said things i probably shouldn't have. What was i saying earlier about my mouth getting into trouble? (Although i'm not in trouble)
I usually have one or two problems with my view points on all issues before i type this.
Well a discussion about controversial issues such as the self-destructive nature of humanity and abortion wasn't the best place for it to happen.
Well a discussion about controversial issues such as the self-destructive nature of humanity and abortion wasn't the best place for it to happen.
Although i don't take back what was said, i probably could have said it in a different manner. My sensitivity made one comment come across slightly personal, but it may not have been intended that way by who posted it. I do believe there is a self destructive tendency to human nature, however my issue with that is that i don't like to admit it.
I won't go into specifics on here but thats where i stand.
I won't go into specifics on here but thats where i stand.
With regards to Abortion, and the laws in Oklahoma about the ultrasounds, i think they're stupid. Compulsory ultrasounds is cruel. The woman should be allowed to do as she pleases, in the end it is her body either way. If the woman wants an abortion, she gets an abortion.
In other news, imma playing pokemans and trying to catch me a motherfucker, i mean ho-oh. I keep killing the bastard >.>
Oh god i feel lame discussing that.... and even lamer for this update: I just caught me some ho-oh
Sexual frustration and essay stress are at highs right now. Also having difficulty aiding a friend through a rather odd situation. I really shouldn't be up so late every night, its 1:10am, even though blogger will say its in the reasonable hours of the morning that i posted this.
Now for some pictures:
John Williams, another rugby crush of mine, he's doing his bit for charity, modelling for a calendar:
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